Texting

Sometimes me and my brother will text each other about whatever. It usually gets ridiculous. Here is a little sampling.....

D: Hey! When do I get my free haircut this month? (I sometimes cut my brothers hair. Which is a win-win for both of us since he gets a free haircut and I get to use scissors! On someone's hair!Weeeeee!)
Me: Whenever you come and bring me presents :) (obviously I would do it for free, I might even pay HIM to let me cut it, but I thought hey it never hurts to ask for presents, something I learned from Santa Clause & Christmas)
D: I dont like that idea.... I like when my hairdresser comes to me!
Me: Well I guess we dont always get what we want.... I do but I've heard dome people dont haha!
D: Lol ur so funny! Maybe after I come get my hair cut I can play poker with you (He is NOT talking about real poker with cards, which I would not be opposed to. But means this horrible game of Poke Her (meaning me) until I scream. Both of my brothers do this to me and its not fun but they think its hilarious)
Me: I'm really more into go fish or monopoly, connect 4, that sort of thing.
D: Well TOO FLIPPIN BAD! WE WILL BE PLAYING POKER
Me: Whatever - poker is "fine" I just thought it would be nice to try a different game is all. Are you really gonna come over? Are your bringing presents?? Are you Santa!?
I didnt get a text back after this so I sent him another...
Me: Dang my text was fun-E & you didnt even write back.....obviously you have no soul.
D: Sorry it was a little uneventful... Lol I have presents if you come to me but there are just too many to bring to you
Me: Now I shall not respond to you! Muahahahaha evil laugh! Wait....
D: Haha but I think u forgot one tiny little detail in ur evil plan to not text me back... U must respond if you want me to tell you....
Me: Oh please Mr "knower of things that may in fact be lame" tell me this detail that promises to be most wonderful and glorious!
D: Haha its the fact that you wont stop! Hahaha my eviler plan to get you to keep texting me has worked and yours has failed!! Muuahahahhhaaaahahhaahhhaa!
Me: Oh puh-lease! This isnt even me texting back, its another person that is not me so.....yah!
D: Really? Well then who is it since its not you texting me!
Me: Sylvia
D: Oh really!? But I thought you had a hot date tonight!
Me: That is true......
D: Aha! I knew it wasn't you Sylvia! Now who is it! I demand to know!
Me: It is me, Bernice
D: Bernice? Whatup B-dawg! Hey... wait! I thought you were in China fighting the deadly disease
Me: I'm on lunch break and uh I bit myself shaving so....just getting that taken care of .....on my lunch break
D: I think that ur lying!
Me: No I can prove it! Who else would know about the unicorn shaped birth mark on the middle of your face!

The End